The Best TWSS Stories (All Time)


  1. My two best friends were exchanging techniques on how to play the Violin. Since I don't play it, I spaced out. After about a minute, I figured they would have changed the conversation.
    As soon as I started paying attention, one of them said "You should start slowly, but as your finger moves up, go a little faster and harder" TWSS

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    (130 Laughs)

     
  2. I was reading a book called Fail Nation, and there was a picture of a sign that said "Behold, I come quickly." TWSS

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    (130 Laughs)

     
  3. I was in my friend's car and I started to roll the window down because it was hot. He stopped me and said not to because "it goes down easy but is hard to get it back up." TWSS.

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    (129 Laughs)

     
  4. When talking to my boss today, I told her that I may need more days than expected for vacation. I hadn't yet put it into the "request-off" book and other people were already requesting similar time off, so she told me, "make sure you put it in soon or I'll cut it off." TWSS.

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    (129 Laughs)

     
  5. Today at camp we were playing Softball. The girl up to bat says "Ugh, Why is it so slippery?" The gym teacher: "I think it might have been the group that was just using it." "Eew, That's disgusting! Can I have a different one?" "Sure, go grab that black one over there." "What's the matter, just suck it up, it's going to be over in a couple seconds anyways!" "You guys might not care if it's dirty but us girls sure do." TWSS.

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    (129 Laughs)

     
  6. My all but innocent friend Sarah was having a very difficult time during the math test. Eventually she couldn't bear the fact that this one question was too hard for her. So, she marches straight up to the teacher and says, "Mr. Meyer, it's just too hard, and I can't bear it any longer. Can you just remove it?" to which she gets the response, "I'm sorry. You'll just have to bear with it. I know its hard, but it's just as hard for everybody else." TWSS.

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    (129 Laughs)

     
  7. me and a friend were on a long car ride and i started to get squirmy in my seat-- i told him: "this is starting to hurt my ass can we switch positions." TWSS

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    (129 Laughs)

     
  8. Today, I was talking to my friend Sidney about her messenger picture. It was of her and blowing a bubble with bubble gum. I commented on it and she said, "Yeah, but I've blown bigger ones, just didn't take pictures." TWSS.

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    (129 Laughs)

     
  9. The other day a patient came in asking for botox treatment. The patient asked the doctor how she'd know if it was working. The doctor replied, "well most people are able to feel it go into them." TWSS.

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    (128 Laughs)

     
  10. I had taken a stick of butter from the fridge and left it out. My mom saw it was starting to melt and she said, "put it back in so it can get hard again." TWSS.

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    (128 Laughs)

     
  11. Today, the SMARTBoard in my math teachers classroom was not working, so she said "I guess we'll have to do it orally." TWSS.

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    (128 Laughs)

     
  12. We were reading a play in english class and our teacher was trying to get us to pick roles to read. Only the lead characters remained when she announced, "Okay, I need two large male parts!" TWSS

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    (127 Laughs)

     
  13. During math class, one of my friends asked the teacher, "Can you do 69 for me?" The teacher replied, "That's very good, I'm so glad you asked. Let's do 69!" TWSS.

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    (127 Laughs)

     
  14. I went to a school acting show case. The teacher told us to put away our cell phones because he thought it was rude. Right after he said that, I blurted out "Just for that, I'm gonna whip it out and play with it." TWSS

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    (127 Laughs)

     
  15. My best friend was driving through a parking lot when another driver began backing out of her spot. My friend, afraid that she was about to be hit, yelled "No! Don't pull out while I'm still coming!" TWSS.

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    (126 Laughs)