The Best TWSS Stories (All Time)


  1. i made brownies in cooking class today. they had nuts in them. everyone started to eat from them. then one of the girls got pissed and said "your nuts are stuck in my throat" TWSS.

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    (169 Laughs)

     
  2. I was with my friend and her grandma going to a chocolate store. Me and my friend were saying how it was warm and melted in your mouth. Her grandma yells "Oh, you really gotta put the whole thing in your mouth, or else all the stuff comes out all over ya" TWSS.

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    (169 Laughs)

     
  3. I was camping with my friend and we went to go fill up a jug with water from the pump. She pumped the water while I held the jug underneath the tap. The jug slipped slightly in my hands causing water spray at me. I said to my friend, "Ugh, you got it all over me!" To which she responded, "It's not my fault! You pulled out too fast!" TWSS.

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    (169 Laughs)

     
  4. I was watching mythbusters and they were trying to make a crossbow out of newspaper, underwear elastic, and a plastic food tray. Then they were gonna shoot it into ballistics gel. Adam said, "I would be happy with 2 inches of penetration." TWSS. Then Jamie said, "I wouldn't." TWSS.

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    (168 Laughs)

     
  5. Talking with a friend about an engineering design issue, he said, "I told him I could work with 5 inches but it would cost about $1,000 more than if he could give me 8 inches." TWSS.

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    (168 Laughs)

     
  6. 2 guys and 4 girls were all out eating one night at a Korean BBQ restaurant. One of the guys has trouble calculating his part of the bill. Then one of the girls said "Geez, it's like he's never eaten out before!" TWSS.

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    (166 Laughs)

     
  7. In a pathology today after seeing a rather large, inflamed gall bladder - one girl exclaims "Wow! That thing is huge, there is no way that would ever fit inside my body!". TWSS.

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    (166 Laughs)

     
  8. Today in english class, my teacher was giving a description of the new book we're going to read. She said "it turns me off because it's so thick but it's still pretty good." TWSS.

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    (166 Laughs)

     
  9. While buying groceries: "I'm just going to wrap your meat so it doesn't mix with the eggs." TWSS

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    (165 Laughs)

     
  10. I was eating corn on the cob with my family at dinner, everyone was using the holders that go in the sides of the corn on the cob but my little sister because she was complaining that they were to hard to put in, so she was just eating it with her hands, my mom proceeds to say "would you stop using your hands and just stick the damn thing in!". TWSS.

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    (165 Laughs)

     
  11. Me and a group of friends were at a Mexican food restaurant and when the food arrived one of the girls exclaimed "There's too much meat in my taco!" TWSS.

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    (165 Laughs)

     
  12. My friend and I were walking to her car after class. She handed me her keys as she was putting her things in the trunk. A little bit later she yelled, "What are you waiting for? Just stick it in already!"  TWSS

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    (165 Laughs)

     
  13. Today, my history teacher was talking about a new computer chair he’d purchased. When one of my classmates asked me how he liked it, he replied, “It’s big enough to satisfy me now.” TWSS

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    (164 Laughs)

     
  14. I was eating lunch with a few friends, they decided to order one large drink and just share it between them with two straws. As one of them was taking a drink, they lifted the straw out of the cup while still sucking on it. The other screamed, "Don't pull it out yet! You're not finished!" TWSS

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    (162 Laughs)

     
  15. The other day my friends and I were hanging out at lunch and one of them was eating a sandwich. She goes, "OMG, this tastes so good in my mouth." TWSS

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    (162 Laughs)