The Best TWSS Stories (All Time)


  1. While buying groceries: "I'm just going to wrap your meat so it doesn't mix with the eggs." TWSS

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    (165 Laughs)

     
  2. I was eating corn on the cob with my family at dinner, everyone was using the holders that go in the sides of the corn on the cob but my little sister because she was complaining that they were to hard to put in, so she was just eating it with her hands, my mom proceeds to say "would you stop using your hands and just stick the damn thing in!". TWSS.

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    (165 Laughs)

     
  3. Me and a group of friends were at a Mexican food restaurant and when the food arrived one of the girls exclaimed "There's too much meat in my taco!" TWSS.

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    (165 Laughs)

     
  4. I got on the elevator at work and said "How's it going?" to one of my coworkers. He held up his index finger signaling me to give him a second and I noticed he was eating something. He finished chewing and said,"Sorry, I couldn't talk, I had nuts in my mouth." TWSS

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    (165 Laughs)

     
  5. Today, my history teacher was talking about a new computer chair he’d purchased. When one of my classmates asked me how he liked it, he replied, “It’s big enough to satisfy me now.” TWSS

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    (164 Laughs)

     
  6. During class one day, one the the students decided to bring in a cake for her birthday. As she was cutting the cake piece by piece a student told her lick the knife off. So she said, "I'm not going to put it in my mouth then stick it back in!" TWSS.

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    (164 Laughs)

     
  7. My friend and I were walking to her car after class. She handed me her keys as she was putting her things in the trunk. A little bit later she yelled, "What are you waiting for? Just stick it in already!"  TWSS

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    (163 Laughs)

     
  8. I was eating lunch with a few friends, they decided to order one large drink and just share it between them with two straws. As one of them was taking a drink, they lifted the straw out of the cup while still sucking on it. The other screamed, "Don't pull it out yet! You're not finished!" TWSS

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    (162 Laughs)

     
  9. A friend and I were driving down the road. He said you lost an earring. I then reached down my shirt to see if it had fallen down my shirt. He asked did you find it. Without thinking I replied "it might be in there, but it's so small I don't feel it." TWSS.

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    (161 Laughs)

     
  10. During lunch, my friend wanted some water from someone else's water bottle, but didn't want to drink from it, so he said, "just squirt it in my mouth, but make sure you aim, I don't want it to get all over my face." TWSS

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    (160 Laughs)

     
  11. One day my friend was eating a huge apple. She cried out in excitement, "Holy sh*t! It's so large and tender! I can barely fit my hands around it!!" TWSS.

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    (160 Laughs)

     
  12. I was at a friend's house and we were eating oranges. She asked if I ate the filmy part around the pulp, and I told her I didn't. She agreed and said, "I just suck on it till the juice comes out." TWSS.

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    (159 Laughs)

     
  13. My friend tends to build tension in her upper back and when it gets really bad she needs someone to crack it for her. I had never cracked anyone's back before so she instructed me as I did it. "Grab me around the body here, now lean back and kinda thrust a few times... Just like that... A little more... Oh God that feels so much better. You can put me down now." TWSS

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    (159 Laughs)

     
  14. The other day I was at my little cousins birthday party. Me and my brother were blowing up balloons. My sister came in and said, "No one blows better than me!" TWSS.

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    (159 Laughs)

     
  15. Today in gym class we had basketball and my teacher said ' go play with those balls , in the mean time i will blow all these balls and try to make them hard." TWSS.

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    (159 Laughs)