risqué


Today the whole school had to sit on the basketball courts in the hot sun and my friend turned to me and said "oh f*** i cant take this, it's hurting my butt." TWSS

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(131 Laughs)

 

So we were in a practice room in orchestra, and the new kid was drinking a juice box. He went to pick up and squeezed so it spilled juice. He then proceeds to say, "Oh man! I squirted!" TWSS.

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(159 Laughs)

 

My sister and I were in kitchen and she decided she wanted some mineral/sparkling water. I made her laughing and once she could finally stop, she yelled "omg! that burned my throat.. seriously i couldn't swallow." TWSS.

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(72 Laughs)

 

At lunch, we're supposed to walk in one door to get our food, and out the other door. Well, every day, my one friend walks in the out door to get his food. This makes me angry, because I always follow the rules. One day, I told him this, saying, "You went in the out door! Not allowed!" TWSS.

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(34 Laughs)

 

I was turning my desk in English and in the process, hit my friend in the butt with it. She then proceeds to scream "Ow don't stick that up my butt, that hurts!" TWSS.

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(190 Laughs)

 

A friend of mine made various desserts and this one girl trys them all and then says "The white one doesn't taste any different then the black one." TWSS.

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(238 Laughs)

 

while watching iCarly with my kids on Disney channel, the principal was on the webcast and was playing a game of "what am i sitting on", where he is blind folded and had to guess he was sitting on. The girls asked him if he was ready...to which he replied "my butt is ready" TWSS.

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(60 Laughs)

 

So one day I was in the dollar store with some friends. One of them was pointing out some glow sticks she saw for sale. She then told a story about one of her prior experiences with one: "I was lying on my back in bed playing with it and it exploded in my face." TWSS.

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(438 Laughs)

 

My sister was sitting on the couch and I wanted to hang upside down from it. so I went to put my feet under her and she screamed really loud" STOP!! get out of my butt!!" TWSS

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(89 Laughs)

 

My friend and i were walking down the hallway at school and we were chewgum she spit her gum in the garbage and said " i spit that out, usually i swallow that sh*it" TWSS

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(61 Laughs)